happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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