areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize