And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Randomize
