Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
