I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
