He disabled his match.com account in front of me
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
