what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
