I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beers last night were like the tears from god
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize