I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
