last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
