He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
