STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
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I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
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You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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