Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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