The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I need help removing her.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize