I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
