I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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