We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
