Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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