it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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