Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I stole a fireplace last night.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
