Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Randomize