before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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