is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
