Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Randomize
