Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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