Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
