she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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