C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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