Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
