why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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