This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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