dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
i know! what is this dateline?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Princesses don't give blow jobs
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.