I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
