How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Randomize
