he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I would fuck him just for his dog
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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