I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
