This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
