porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Randomize
