I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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