the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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