Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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