god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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