god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
