thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
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