Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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