His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
