Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
My boob is missing a layer of skin
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
