I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
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