dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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