So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize